Dream Goal
None
Meditation and Sleep
No meditation. Haven’t done so in a while.
Dream
I don’t remember where I was. But I was in a place that felt like a school, or a schoolyard. I was expecting to see “my youngest child” there. In my head I knew that child was Toby, but the name that kept coming out was Sebastian. I couldn’t bring myself to say Toby’s name, almost as though it had been forgotten from my lips. But I could see his face vividly. Suddenly, I recalled Toby’s name and realized he was missing. I started a frantic search. The dream ends there.
Contemplations and Connections
I wonder if this relates to a conversation Emily and I had. We were talking about the last time we discussed our preferences for delivering a baby. I erroneously stated that it was 12 years ago. Emily corrected me, saying it was now 13 years ago (Toby would have turned 13 in October). A part of me feels frozen, even while time continues to march forward, and my new life without Toby continues to take shape around me.